its sad, and it's painful, but anway,
no matter how much you try to plan a hard conversation, to ensure it happens at a time you have enough headspace and sure emotional buffers, but actually you have no hold on these things. when it happens, you just have to roll with the punches.
but the heart has a way of getting what it wants through, no matter how much hurt it will cause. and there isn't much you can do about it except to accept it and live through it. well, it was bound to go either way, and i know deep in myself how much i'd be sad if it had to end, and now here it is. it's sad, and it's painful, but anyway, life has to happen, and the doors and windows need not close.